Finding My Voice

I have been looking for a voice.
My voice shuttering.
While others merging to shouts uttering, muttering confusion.
The same single minded obsession
Leaving world noise crashing into me.
It shuts me down.
They all pretend, but…
(So many obstacles getting in the way.)

I have been looking for a voice to get attention.
Being taught to make noise to feel alive.
A battery charged at 99%
Tears of what’s pretending to be.
I don’t want noise.
I want to float.
Words like the wind.
To move, just to move, on the move.
I am not seen.
So I change the rules.
To shift the world.
With possible gentle words
To find my voice.
To scream it the hell out.
Yell, damn it!
Just to hear what I have to say.

Dark
Crashing, trashing, overanalyzing
Without it.
Well…
It that even true?
Speaking now quietly.
Gently, becoming possible to hear.

Hear me damn it!
Just hear me.
Trying to find my voice.
Will that ever happen?