Mirror Image

I swear.
It is like you know me.
Better than I know myself.
When I look in the mirror alone.
All I see is a little girl.
Unfamiliar to me.
This girl wears a mask
To hide who she truly is inside.
A fake smile.
To hide the sorrow.
When you are there
It is like a force drawn.
Same tastes.
Same kid of hate.
Musical intellectuals
We know who and want we want.
Yet we go for something
More complicated.
Only we understand it.
Its like a record hit.
I don't literally see you as my mirror image.
I see the emotion that is beneath it.
I see the personality underneath it.
Similar yet different.
Something that doesn't linger.
Our friendship will never hinder.
They wont know what we see.
What we have been through.
Only you know me, in a way.
You are like my mirror image.
Tainted by an amazing friendship.
And a deadly attraction.

Fatal Attraction

Looking deep within mu soul
This deadly attraction is making it hard to behold.
As much as I fought for appreciation.
My hormones are out of control.
I am many souls of the past.
Solutions aren't within my grasp.
Close friends we are.
I am drawn to you.
Out chemistry between us
Is insanely intense.
Vulnerable we are.
Te energy between us is so real.
Heat felt, passion flow.
The neglect of my man
Making every deadly sin come into play.
It may be wrong
But somehow feels right.
I can dream all I want.
I won't lie nor front.
Closely entwined.
I can barely look you in the eyes.
The attention I deserve from my man,
Is what I'm not getting anyway.
You left before.
Me not knowing
Now you are here, I can't loose you again.
But now I cling to you a little more.
So that is not good regardless.
A force like that can not be broken.
You give that much to me without even trying.
But I'm literally dying.
Tearing apart deep within my soul.
Having two things at once makes me live.
This fatal attraction we have
Makes me live and forget a little.

How To Smile

I don't know how
To even smile
Everytime I try
I always get let down

Never knew a place
To call my own
Feel so alone
Don't want to come back home.

Try to be a
Superwoman
Try to be a
Extraordinary

So overly crowded
Never any space
Need to find my place
A world without hate,

I put on a mask
To cover up the distraught fast
To keep myself somewhat enlightened
Still, I can't even truly smile.

If I Only Had That Chance

He had always had my attention.
Since way back when
Middle school and so on.
Many not realizing
How special he truly was.
Treating him like he was irrelevant
Though I know thats not true.

I know he's the kind of guy
When he finds love
He gives the world.
But he gave me the title as friend
Now its way to late.
He found love
And so have I
So it doesn't even matter
How we're attracted to each other anymore.

We call and text all the time
Even in my relationship
I like him so I never mind.
He's in love with her
I try to help him so.
All I want is one thing
To see him happy and in love.
We have a little history
Nothing but a small thing though.
Best friend we will stay though.
Even though, you could say
That is not right to the man I love ever-so.

We choose to shake it off
Amused by the way he talks
The words that i speak are real.
I kid, and joke a bit
But if only I had the change
Way back before.
But it is a-ok now

Giving Up

Feelings Known Too Well, Out In The Open

Things about me are so different
But has never changed,
I have always been the same way
Something no one seems to understand.

Incomplete
Neglected
And alone
Feelings I know all too well.
The love of the unknown
Who I am, out in the open.

I give in to the love of my life
Ignored while being alive
Unappreciated, though he doesn't know.
Now it's all so-so.

Another attraction, somewhat dormant
Released out of nowhere
Caring ever-so-much
What to do?
I have no possible clue
All I can do
Go with the flow and follow the mind clues.

I'm not a freak
Or someone who constantly seeks
Cherished memories
Shattered dreams
Nothing is better than a tarnish heart or so it seems

I let go with another person
While the love of my dreams complete ignores me
Been through way too much
Somehow a total mind break

Not too many people know me.
Some think they do
You all aren't mind readers
Impossible to try unless I told you.

I know I don't deserve to be happy
But I live the life of mine
Keeping my dedications
Reading it loud and clear.


Incomplete
Neglected
And alone
Feelings I know all too well.
The love of the unknown
Who I am, out in the open.

Pisces Rising

From R&B music to bebop.
To funk to fusion
From semi-charmed life to reggae
To subtle rock and roll.

I stay cool under pressure
When others may pop.
I'm ruled by the misconstrued life of the sky.
Consider me shy but I aim high.
Never unpredictable.
Never out of step.
Ahead of my time.
Built on intellect.
Sucker for being different.
Anything breaking new ground.

A story of a Pisces rising.
No so surprising
Fascinated by the future unknown.
Experimental, in my zone.
Impatient with people who couldn't care less.
Creativity by nature.
I rock amethysts.

Lover of art and harmony.
Swimming through the flow of life.
Heart in constant strive.
From the bottom to the top.

Being pulled into two directions.
Rocking the heart, open-minded.
Business type, far from cutthroat.
Not throwing myself to the world.
Just the chance to express myself.
Imagination, pressed upon oneself.
Attainment to humanity
Insight and creativity to keep my sanity.

A story of a Pisces rising
Not so surprising
Touched by human suffering.
Sensitive to others.  

Continuos Mending and Re-mending of A Tainted Heart

I try not too
But I always smile and laugh on the outside
Completely different on the inside
This heart of mine
Which has been shattered and broken way too many times.
Picked up the millions of pieces
Glue it together
With clear, quick-dry super glue.
Sewn together with thread and leather.
Then held in place with colored duck tape
Wrapped around several times to keep in place
Wear and tears slowly
As I continue with this life of mine.

No purpose in mind
Just out to satisfy and please others
With no thought of wanting
Anything in return
I care to tend to other people's feelings
Before handling my own dealings.
My so-called happiness I rarely even seek.
Forgiving is by nature
Generosity, no hatred.
No second thought on my mind
No ounce of regret.
Whether society deserves it or not.
I treat everyone all the same.
I'm satisfied
When I put myself out there
And help everyone else.

Even when everyone thinks differently
Pass judgement, so senseless.
Stick up for what I believe in
Even if it costs me my own life.
Sometimes, that is how it is.
It is a continuos rotation
Heart peeling
and re-mending
As I satisfy the needs of others.

Unappreciated

I don't expect to many things out of life.
Because everything has its own price.
We have been together for way to long.
But I feel more like the words in a song.

We barely see each other
Its not our fault
But once we get on the phone.
Everything comes to a halt.

The ignorance of your sarcasm.
You made a promise
Not to leave me all alone
Thats how I feel when I'm home.

I never hear the words "beautiful" com out your mouth.
All the morals of what I need and want have gone south.
Am I meant not to really be too happy?
I've gave it time, so why?

I never feel like I am a first priority
Hardly ever
I'm normall second, third, or even sometimes fourth.
I feel like I'm the last person you think about even when you say I'm all you think about.

I'm like the petals of a poor bouquet
You keep giving me promises of what you can buy me.
I do't need you to buy me all the things in the world you see.
All I need and want is you.

My walls are beginning to crumple down.
I'm not stopping them this time.
But nobody appreciates
How hard I try to keep them up.

These days all you want is the same thing.
Sex when i finally see and not the little things.
Remember me telling you I enjoyed the little things?
Now you are always tired, you can't even stay up with me anymore.

You keep on saying you have done so much for me
All you did was buy my love more than anything.
 have always blamed myself for everything that goes wrong.
Like another sad love song.

I haven't given up.
I love you way more than life itself.
Sometimes I don't even get a thank you.
Or to just spend more precious time rather always in your house.

My dreams and interests always sucks in your eyes.
Sometimes I just want us to walk and enjoy the nice weather
But we argue, in which you seems as though its nothing
But it means more to me than just nothing.

You are missing the passion that I have for you.
You don't even compliment me
Nothing but criticizing that isn't even constructive.
When will you finally understand me?

I know you will never cheat on me
Or even leave me.
But more and more
I feel unappreciated by the things you do.

After Midnight

The thoughts starts pouring in. 

Fall Into Place

I wish things could fall into place
Somehow it always comes to me into broken pieces.
It's a kind-of sleepwalk
That never ends.
I can't escape
Or so it seems.
I'm well aware
Shards and pieces dormant in my dreams.
My nightmare
Seems like I'm falling
Nobody to catch me.
Messed up
In this fake crazy world
Thoughts that chase me
Thundering and lightening
Rain dripping on the window pane.
Lonely
I'm breaking down.
Two, Three times I cry
Things that never seem to die.
Half sleep
Trying to wake up.
Shards piercing my soul
Try to understand
Constant wondering
My nightmare
Unforgiven
I'm just driven
Even with these shards
Cutting through my weak veins
I'm kept together.
Even when it doesn't fall into place.

Enjoy: Ink It! Acknowledge It! Restore It!

What is life for?
Is it for you?
Reach out.
Seize the day.
Settle for more.
But for no one.
Get of the beaten path.
Make the time.
For what you love.
Let it all align.
Relish the joys of living.
And interestingly by giving.
Look for the good.
And you'll find it
Open your arms.
Take it all in.
Even put on a subtle grin.
Life is the ground adventure.
Any life worth living
Is worth recording
Don't think about it.
Ink it!

Reassure myself.
When I'm overwhelmed
Completely normal.
Insanity.
The only difference
Between me and the rest of the population.
I acknowledge it!
They are in mind-blowing denial.

In dreams
There are no impossibilities .
Capture new ideas.
Encouraging you to press on.
Regardless.
Expand on those magical callings
Senseless.
Giving yourself wings.
Hope
Wish
Dream
Restore it!

Struggle of Creative Block; Breakthrough!

All of us struggle.
At one time or another.
With creative block.
The subtle tick-tock of the clock.

It inevitably striking.
At the worse possible moment.
Leaving you paralyzed.
Somewhat inept.

Take solace in knowing.
That no one is alone.
It happens to all of us.
It sets on an intellectual tone.

It is an unavoidable part
Of the creative process.
Breakthrough!
Thinking of lively compilation of strategies.

Every block is different
Interesting solutions and possibilities.
Mind of interest
At times weird, but inspiring.

Breakthrough!
A rocket fuel
For the creative side.
In need of catalyst.
Just to get the ideas flowing again.

Safety Net of Life and Frustration

Run from the conflict
Into something
Too good to be true
When It collapses
When the load baring walls
Crumple under the weight of lies

Will the safety net
Of comfort
Still be as strong as you left it

Will it wither away?
Or live on the edge
Give no care
Stand at the precipice
and stare dead
Into the abyss!

9:01am

All you can do in life is try your best.
Always greater than, not less than.
All a constant ten.
Let it all come to a full blend.

Our life has constant trials.
No more wasting time.
Always pushing forward.
Never backwards.

Currently it's 9:01am.
Close to 10 but not yet.
En route to where I'm going.
As my music plays my favorite song.

Living in the moment.
No turning back.
You and me, no regrets.
Everyone else, irrelevant.

If Only

That the best part of my life is you and me
You and I are a perfect plan
There are some things I can't withstand
So much we have went through
Not a day goes that I'm constantly thinking of you.
Making time stand still
Things we can't explain
I believe in you
I trust in you

If only, you listen
To these random thoughts I propose to you
The loving musing of or future life too.
I still feel alone
Like you are there, but not there at the same time.

I want us a true couple
Someone others look up to
No lies
Nothing to feel ashamed of